:|

Your friendship scares me
Your closeness scares me
Your memories scares me
Your history scares me
Your conversations scare me
Your constant talks scares me
Your nicknames scare me
Everything about this I want to get used to
Everything about this I want to get over

B
U
T

Everything about this makes me over think
Everything about this makes me worry
Every little thing makes me scared

because they're all with,..



h
e
r
.

I'm learning

from Amy, the expert, how to be ambiguous.
It's so hard.
Saying one thing and keep people guessing for hours;
Keep em on their toes;
HAHA,..I'm not so good at this but,..

That's my new goal this year
:D

Will

- she forget all the memories we shared?
- he, one day realize that he made the wrong decision?
- she ever realize how much she means to me?
- they, one day feel disappointed in me?
- he ever know how much I need him?
- she, one day, take him away from me?
- she ever find one boy for her? (inside joke)
- he ever treat me like the princess I want to be?
- they ever let me go free?
- he ever get a girl?
- she ever forget about him?
- he ever know how much I love hugging him?
- they ever win the cup? (just because Amy told me to put this)
- I ever meet those guys?
- we actually last?
- he ever tell me the truth?


try to figure out who/what these are all about (only me&amy know)
(:

Why do they say it's easy?

Is high school supposed to be easy? Because that's what my parents think. They complain about me staying up late every night and they tell me that I'm going to crash and burn one day, not too far from now because of my lack of sleep. I know that I need to sleep to function and I do admit that I haven't gotten my required amount of hours every night but I really cannot help it. Either I'm doing homework or I'm talking to someone on the phone with their problems. I can't help but care about my friends so I can't just leave them to deal with their own problems by themselves. Homework seems to be piling up more and more everyday so I tend to stay up later and later every night. That's normal and should be expected right? My parents are so used to seeing me sleep at 9 or 10 back in freshman year that they believe that I'm just messing around at night, blowing off homework. I do occassionally, if lucky, get a chance to take naps, but my parents still think I can get at least 1o hours every night. To me, that's impossible, or at least it is until spring break or something. Thank goodness for spring break. I really cannot wait for that so I can catch up on my sleep again.

wow, totally getting off topic now.

my bad.

:P

Make-up work

YAY. Loads of F-U-N right?
No, not really. I guess this is what I get for going to DCON and having fun for the weekend though...coming back to a bunch of essays and projects and worksheets. Oh yeah. Totally should've seen that coming,..I can have fun for a limited amount of time and escape from all this school stuff, but once I return, the work come flying at me at top speed and they all just happen to be due right before spring break. Yeahp, perfect.
haha.
I'm done venting here.
Time to go back to homework.
wootwoot(:

Dear Me,

I don't think I know you all that well. Like seriously, I wish I knew how your brain worked and what you really think of this world. I feel like I don't know myself at all and I really want to know the REAL me, the one that has nothing to hide. I wish you weren't so insecure about every single little thing in this world. I wish you would start believing in yourself more often, or just in general. I hope you would just stop hiding yourself from me and tell me what you really want in life. I hope that you'll just come out from wherever you are soon enough and show me who you really are. On that day, I will finally truly be myself truthfully say I found myself. I really do hope that, that day will come soon.


Love,
Myself.

District convention

DCON [2009] for short.

Spirit competitions after one another
Screaming, shouting, dancing in every corner
Fighting to get on the elevators
Pushing and stepping on everyone's feet
Loads and loads of fun
A bajillion unforgettable memories
& last but not least,
Three thousand crazy kids packed in one room.

try and imagine that
I dare you.